Running away from you

I’m pretty sure that nobody would ever say I’m the most polite person in the world.  I’m not purposely impolite - I say please, thank you, excuse me; I don’t intentionally run little old ladies off the sidewalk; I try not to chew with my mouth open or spit on people when I talk.  But I think the sarcasm and bluntness that is my personality makes it inherently impossible to be seen as as “polite person” (you know exactly the type of person I’m talking about).

There is one activity that I (somewhat) regularly partake in where I’m unapologetically impolite about, though (ok, if I think really hard, there’s probably way more than one..): running with other people.  If I go running with someone else, it’s usually not to chat and I usually have my music playing.  And if they’re slower than me, I have no problem at all forging ahead with a “let’s catch up at the end.”  That’s if I even let people come running with me in the first place.

You see, running is one of my escapes.  An option for my me time.  Just me, my music, and my thoughts.  

So on the rare occasion when I go running with someone else, I usually make a feeble attempt to pretend that I had no intention of putting my earbuds in and zoning out, before I actually just put my earbuds in and zone out.  I have no idea what the proper etiquette on this is.  Is running with others supposed to be a social occasion?  Or is it supposed to be more of a safety in numbers, buddy system, just in case you sprain your ankle/get attacked by a deer/run into a tree there’s someone else there to call 9-1-1 type of thing?  And how do you know which it is in any particular situation?

I run with my sister a lot.  We run at about the same pace, although I’m a little bit faster.  She knows that I have no interest in chatting while we run, so the headphones go in for both of us right away. If we need to talk, we make hand signals and pull one earbud out before going back to ignoring each other.  But I feel like this is rude to do if I’m running with a friend or acquaintance that I’m not so close with.  I think part of this is my social ineptitude coming through.

Even worse, I keep to my own pace, even if my running partner is slower than me (seriously, it’s always about me.  And running slower than you naturally run sucks and makes me more tired than running faster than I regularly would.  Strange.).  If I go running with my husband, we’ll generally start out together for the first few minutes before I hit my stride and head out in front of him.  I usually finish a good few minutes earlier than him.  And to be honest, I’d probably finish even earlier than that if I didn't keep turning around to check on him and make sure that he didn't fall in a hole or pass out or something (see, I am considerate!).  

I think that this annoys him; that he’s one of those people that sees running as more of a social activity, a time for bonding.  He doesn't like to have to “chase” me (his words) to keep up when we’re running; I’m the complete opposite - I love running with someone faster because it motivates me to give it my all.  My competitive side comes out, and I hate falling behind, even if it’s not a race.  I hate losing.

I ran a 10K last weekend with my husband and one of his friend’s wives.  She’s slightly slower than me and he’s slightly slower than her.  We were in the same corral at the starting line, but once the starting gun went off, I didn’t see them again until the finish line.  It was probably rude of me to take off, but I was in my groove, doing my own thing.  I ran the fastest that I've ever run that distance.  And, while I obviously didn’t win the race (seriously, who can run a 10K in under 30 minutes?! I can barely run a 5K in under 30!), competitive me was happy that I beat both my husband and my friend by several minutes each!

I’m sure Emily Post is rolling over in her grave.  I wonder if she ever wrote a book on running etiquette.  It would probably say something like “woman should not sweat, spit, or pick wedgies.”  Off to charm school for me, then.