Muck it

Muddy Megan. That was my family’s nickname for me growing up.  (Flattering, I know. I was clearly destined to never be a fashionista or even remotely un-tomboyish.)

Legend has it that I used to love to play in the mud (and who are we kidding - I generally still do).  Back when I was a wee lass, I would find any mud puddle within a 50 mile radius (or, you know, in my backyard or driveway since I wasn’t allowed to go past the street) that I could and splash around in it.  And, if no mud was to be found (say, in the case of a drought), not to fret - I would just make my own with my apple juice (presumably from my sippy cup.  I feel like that would take a really long time to make any significant amount of mud.).  

It’s true.  My dad actually wrote an article about this once (and since it was in the pre-everything on the internet days and I didn’t really feel like doing any sort of exhaustive search to try and find it, I’m not going to link to it here.  But it does exist.).  It was actually about home buying, but he managed to thoroughly embarrass toddler me in the process.  There’s a framed copy of the article somewhere in his attic still.  

And forget dressing me in white.  One year, when I was maybe 1 or 2, my aunt bought me a white jumpsuit for my Easter outfit.  Every single picture from that day shows two nice grass stains on the knees.  Apparently the outfit barely lasted two minutes once I walked out the door.  It’s still a really bad idea for me to wear white.

So one day several years ago when my sister showed my mom an ad for a MudRun to benefit the National MS Society, mom’s first reaction was “your sister (meaning me) should do that!”

At that time, I had just started to eat better and get back into shape.  I was really just in the beginning stages, and couldn’t even yet run a full 5K.  But never one to back down from a challenge, I signed up.  My sister and I got together a team, and one really hot day in August, we all gathered at Liberty State Park in Jersey City.  

Over the course of about two hours (I was slow then. I’m still slow now, but significantly less slow), I completed a 5 or so mile run, interspersed with obstacles that mainly centered around crawling through mud and climbing over things.  And I had a blast!  Even though I ended up running with my sister’s boyfriend’s co-worker who I had just met that day.  And even though it was probably 85+ degrees.  And even though I walked way more than I ran between obstacles.

After that, my sister, her boyfriend, and I decided to sign up for a few more mud runs.  We got some friends to do a few, but mostly it’s just been the three of us.  We’ve done really great ones (I think MudManX and the second year that we did the MS mud run were my favorite) and some not so great ones (the first year of the MS one and Warrior Dash are at the bottom of my list).

But even a bad mud run beats running on a treadmill, or even just a long, solo run, in my book. So, I will continue to say yes whenever anyone asks me to do one.  And I will continue to wear the same outfit to every one (although I donated my shoes at the end of this last one.  After about 5 or so mud runs over the past 2-3 years, I figured they were going to fall apart soon.  I have a new mud run pair lined up).  And I will continue to compare each mud run against the others.

Want to run one?  Let me know - I’ll come run it with you!  No, seriously, I totally will.

But in the meantime, here are some things that I’ve learned about mud runs (other than the fact that they’re awesome and being muddy is probably even greater when you’re an adult and it’s less socially acceptable than it was when you were a kid):

• They’re expensive. They generally range from about $50 to upwards of $100, depending on which one and how far in advance you sign up.  On the plus side, though, that usually includes a fun festival with vendors, music, and food, a free t-shirt or some other sort of swag, and a free beer.  Who doesn’t want to run many miles over and through mud and many tough obstacles for a free beer?  It tastes so much better than the ones that you buy at the store!
• Plan your outfit strategically. A lot of people like to wear costumes or cute team shirts for these events.  This is a great idea, especially if everything is cheap and disposable.  Just make sure that your costume isn’t going to weigh you down, get caught on things, or otherwise just be a nuisance.  (True story: a friend of mine did a Tough Mudder once and said that a big, surly, tough guy was wearing chains to do the race.  He jumped off one of the obstacles into a lake and sunk to the bottom from the weight.  He had to be rescued by the lifeguards.  Don’t be that guy.)  If you don’t want to wear a costume, that’s also totally cool.  Just wear something that’s not too baggy and that you don’t care about if it gets ripped or if the mud doesn’t fully wash out. Depending on the obstacles, you might want to consider wearing long sleeves or long pants (or having high socks).  I have worn a pair of capri leggings and a form fitting tank top for each mud run I’ve ever done and have never had a problem.  (Also, I have mixed feelings on gloves - I wore them for one race, and while they were helpful on some obstacles - like anything with a rope where you would otherwise burn your hands - they were a hindrance on some others - basically anything with a smooth surface that you had to grip onto, like monkey bars.  I suppose I could have put them on and taken them off as needed, but that’s just too much extra work.)
• Don’t wear anything that you care about. Just don’t.  It’s a dumb idea. You’re going to be crawling through mud, diving into water, rubbing elbows with and running into dozens of other muddy people.  This is not the time to wear those brand new state of the art compression shorts, or your $200 running shoes.  It’s not the time to break out your super expensive, top of the line sunglasses.  It’s the time to remove all jewelry, especially anything that could get caught on something or that you would be upset about if it got lost of damaged.  
• Look at the course before you sign up.  Do you hate running anything more than 5 miles?  Then a 12 mile mud run probably isn’t for you.  Hate getting hit in the face with stuff?  I’d cross Spartan Race off the list.  Have a fear of open water?  Make sure your run doesn’t include lake-based obstacles.  To be fair, you often won’t be able to find out all of the details of a run prior to signing up.  But do some research, look at old courses, or contact the organizers if there’s anything that you’re really concerned about.
• Buddy up. This is not a run to do solo. This one is two-fold.  First, it’s just more fun to do with a friend or a group of friends.  Rolling in the mud by yourself makes you look insane.  Rolling in the mud with your closest friends makes you look like you know how to have a good time.  But, even more importantly, there’s an actual strategic reason for running with someone else. Some of the obstacles can be hard.  Some require strategizing, or seeing someone else do it first, and some just plain require teamwork and a helping hand.  Everyone running the race is generally really nice and willing to help you out if you need it, but really, wouldn’t you much rather your BFF be the one pushing you up a wall by your ass than a random (muddy, disgusting) stranger?
• Come prepared.  Bring a towel, change of clothes, flip flops, and plastic bag for your muddy stuff. There will most likely be a fire hose or portable showers at the end to wash off.  It’s not elegant, but it gets the job done.  Make sure that you have a towel and set of clothes to change into after you’re all hosed off - you won’t want to be walking around drinking your free beer while you’re still all muddy or soaking wet.  And you definitely won’t want to sit in your car that way either.  Your shoes will also be completely useless to you at that point.  You most likely won’t be able to get your feet totally clean and dry, so putting on another pair of shoes is pointless. I suggest bringing flip flops to wear - especially if it’s a cheap pair that are easy to clean off (or throw out) when they get dirty.  Lastly, make sure that you bring several plastic bags to put all of your dirty stuff in.  Trust me, you’ll thank me. 
• Have fun and don’t worry about your time. You’re diving into mud.  Climbing over and under things.  Crawling. Wading through cold, dirty, bug-infested water (yay, cicadas!).  Waiting for the slow pokes in front of you to slide down the fireman pole so that you can take your turn.  This is not a race to run for time.  You’re not going to set a PR.  Get over it.  Enjoy it.  Have fun.  Throw mud on a friend.  Joke about how ridiculous you look trying to climb over a log.  Pose for stupid pictures with the event photographer. This is meant to be a fun race.  A race to challenge yourself and push your limits.  Sure, it’s great if you get a time you can be proud of, but really, it’s not always all about time.  Or about winning.  Although I did beat my husband and sister in last weekend’s run!

Crossing the finish line at last weekend's MS MuckFest! 

 (Snooki also ran it - although I didn't see her.  But I beat her time.)